Thursday, 30 July 2015

How to Entertain Kids on a budget

As lots of you are probably already aware (either because you already have kids of your own or because the roads on the way to work have been so quiet) its the school summer holidays.
Now I'm no mummy blogger. I don't say that in a snotty way I completely identify with wanting to talk about your child endlessly and I can see how sharing that on a blog can be enjoyable, its just that whilst I fully expect my close friends and family to pretend they find my regular updates about my child fascinating I don't expect anyone else to. 
me with Mini Me
Ive never really felt I fit the mould of typical mum. I love my daughter with a passion bordering on pathological but even early on when she was a small baby I found the fact that lots of other mums only wanted to talk about their children to the exclusion of all other topics quite tedious.My own mum has never been like that either so obviously the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. She had me and my siblings but still did a degree in fashion, worked as a fashion designer and owned her own boutique (one of the highlights of my goth teenage years was when the bassist from The Cult wore one of her paisley shirts on Top of the pops) She was also a punk in the seventies going to see everyone from Blondie to The Sex Pistols in Vivienne Westwood bondage trousers,yet she was also home before us every day, baked amazing birthday cakes and was generally "mumsy" albeit in a fairy glam way.
My very stylish Mum sometime in the late 70's
Anyway I digress. What I'm trying to say is I don't often write about the fruit of my loins as I don't imagine anyone gives a crap. However today I thought I would share with you some of the ways I entertain a very bored child on a very low budget. 
I have no doubt that she will grow up needing therapy and hating me for not taking her to Legoland (I will feel I have failed somehow if she doesn't churn out a Mommy Dearest style memoir) but right now she feels she is having the best holiday in the world. Here are the highlights of "Betty Pamper Style entertainment'
Watching the boats-yes that passes as entertainment. Who needs a PlayStation

Puddle Jumping-Who needs Alton Towers when its wet outside. Putting on wellies and allowing my daughter to jump in big wet muddy puddles killed hours. The joy of having permission to be yobby and get wet should not be underestimated.
Puddle Jumping Joy
Capturing Fairies-The fairies were just prints outs of the Cottingly garden fairies stuck on coffee stirrers and planted in the flower beds which we had to find and trap in old jam jars.She is now obsessed with seeing "real" fairies, god forbid if one ever does stumble upon Pamper Towers. She will have it netted and in captivity in a heartbeat.
Going to feed the ducks and buy a ice cream. You know despite what the adverts tell you a bag of oats, starving hungry ducks and the promise of an ice cream actually are as exciting to a child as a trip to a "Build A Bear" workshop.About £25 cheaper as well.

Ahoy me hearties
Freebie Museums Can Be Fun. I took my little one to the Liverpool maritime museum convinced she would be bored witless. Whilst she had no interest in much of it she found the old films of people sailing away hilarious and loved the huge anchors and models of boats especially one which was bright pink. I realise she will hate anything at a museum or even slightly educational in a year or so but whilst I can get away with it I'm riding that free admission like a cowgirl at a rodeo.
So those are my tips for entertaining little ones for virtually no money. Thrifty and fun-hell yeah!

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